How to Find a Long-Term Relationship: Intention, Skills, Marketing

We’ve spent a lot of time on Being Well discussing how to improve our relationships--how to navigate conflict effectively, communicate more skillfully, and create a romantic relationship that’s truly fulfilling, but we’ve spent very little time talking about how to get into one of those relationships in the first place.

Today, Dr. Rick Hanson and I talk about how to maximize your chances of finding a fulfilling long-term relationship. We explore how to develop a clear intention of what you want, the key psychological skills that invite a healthy relationship, and how to market yourself authentically while dating.

Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube.

Key Topics:

0:00: Introduction

1:55: What supports people in finding a long-terrm partner?

4:35: Having a clear intention

8:45: Psychological skills to maximize our chances of finding a long-term relationship

12:15: Marketing and sorting through suspects

14:40: Intention expanded

22:15: Psychological skills expanded

22:50: A healthy sense of self worth

26:10: Being aware of your selection biases

29:35: Communication skills

34:30: Seeing the best in one another

37:30: Settling anxious and avoidant tendencies

42:00: Resting in presence with someone

43:15: Not letting the perfect be the enemy of the good

44:25: Marketing explained

55:00: Authenticity

58:20: Recap

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Dating 101: Green and Red Flags, Your First Fight, Dealing With Rejection

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Existential Dread, and Overcoming an Existential Crisis